Example: Your name is Mr. Smith, and Jane is your friend.
Jane: “Mr. Smith is really embarrassing.”
Betty: “Is he? Then why do you hang out with him?”
Is Mr. Smith really embarrassing, or is that just Jane’s perception of Mr. Smith?
If Jane feels embarrassed when she’s out in public with Mr. Smith, then who’s really the problem? Mr. Smith doesn’t feel embarrassed. As a matter of fact, he feels good about himself when he goes out.
Perhaps, instead of passing judgement on Mr. Smith, Jane should just hang out with Betty more, and let Betty hang out with Mr. Smith. Maybe Betty will have a different opinion about Mr. Smith.