There’s a lot of abuse in this world, and abuse is a means to control. Abuse comes in all forms, but I wanted to focus on something specific in this article.
Have you ever been the victim or target of a loaded question? In case you don’t know, a loaded question is one that attempts to limit direct replies to whatever serves the questioners agenda.
Here’s an example. You’ve been working really hard at your job for the last two years, but for whatever reason, the company just laid you off.
Someone asks you, “Hey, are you ever going to get a job?”
This question implies you don’t work, it’s designed to place guilt on you. THE PERSON WHO’S ASKING YOU THIS QUESTION IS FUCKING WITH YOU!
Do not attempt to answer it with a yes or no because no matter how you answer, you fall victim to this type of question. You have to rise up, and challenge back by saying, “I’ve been working for the last two years.”
There’s also something else I noticed recently, which is another way an abuser could try to provoke you or bait you into an argument.
The abuser will ask you to do something you’ve already done. You might be watching television and notice the volume is too loud, so you turn it down.
The abuser will ask you not even a minute later, “Can you turn the volume down, it’s too loud,” knowing and fully aware you just did that.
Or, how about this? One morning I went to the food store to pick up some groceries, but later in the day I noticed I forgot several items I really wanted so I returned to the food store in the evening. When I got home I was asked, “How many times a day do you have to go to the food store?”
That question or anything like it is to be ignored because the person is clearly trying to start an argument with you. You might feel like saying, “Mind your business, or Why does it bother you if I go to the food store twice in one day,” but don’t. You’re dealing with a petty person who has a problem with you, and when someone has a personal problem with you it doesn’t matter what you say or how nice you try to say it.
They want you to respond, they want you to acknowledge them, and they want your attention because they want to drain your energy. This isn’t good. Mental abusers who are draining your energy will eventually make you sick. Yes. They will stress you out and eventually make you sick because they are killing your happiness.
Put your headphones in, ignore them, and move out and away as soon as you can.
There are people in this world who are miserable, and you know what they say about misery. It loves company. These people aren’t happy until they’ve made you miserable. Stay away from these people. Do not give them your time. You’re not being rude, you’re protecting yourself and your health.